disclaimer: the official stance of the government of canada is that parents should not bed-share with their infants. co-sleeping is encouraged, with a crib or bassinet in the same room, but sharing your bed with your baby is frowned upon. additionally, they believe in #backtosleep, which follows that infants should always be placed on their back to sleep to decrease the risk of sudden infant death syndrome (or SIDS), a fatal condition for which a cause has yet to be determined.
the opinions stated in this article are based on my personal experience and are for informational purposes only. i purchased this product and am providing an unbiased review based on our usage over the last several weeks. please be sure to do your own research into safe sleep practices to determine which products, if any, are right for your family.
sleep has always been a problem for us. i remember not getting a lot of it when dylan was an infant. i was terrified of SIDS and all manner of other things that could go wrong (like an irrational fear that someone would break into our apartment and kidnap her from her crib). because of this, i made the decision to put her to sleep on my chest. while i told myself that this was best for all of us – i could sleep, she could sleep, she was close come time for breastfeeding, etc – insert justification here – i was also riddled with guilt because we were essentially disregarding the rules laid out by canada health.
luckily, there seem to be more moms out there who are supportive rather than sanctimonious. there’s nothing worse than feeling so alone in your situation and desperately wanting to talk about it but not doing so out of fear of the backlash from internet trolls, of whom mother’s with nothing better to do can be some of the worst. (i’ve seen it with my very own eyes, women are vicious.) i didn’t talk about our sleeping situation then, though i wish i had. we ended up bedsharing with dylan for a good two and a half years until we moved into our new house and she upgraded to her own big girl room.
what this meant was that there wasn’t enough room in our queen size bed for the three of us, seeing as the SO likes to spread eagle (and sometimes i find him stretched diagonally from one side to the other…) he also moves around in his sleep as much as she does. not to mention he was terrified of rolling over on her. all fair, i’d say.
i said from the beginning of our second pregnancy that i wouldn’t get caught in the same trap again. my mother gifted us a beautiful bassinet by fisher price that vibrates and has music and lights, i was totally gung-ho to put him in it immediately and move on with our lives.
and then we brought him home and realized that his moro reflex woke him up pretty regularly, and despite our best efforts we still haven’t figured out how to swaddle tightly enough. he’s also a grunter, a symptom i attribute to that ubiquitous infant sleep disturber, gas.
what i’m getting at is i used every excuse i could to turn that bassinet into a glorified clothes horse.
if i’m going to be frank for a moment (can i be frank? not officially of course, i’ll always be melissa), i didn’t want a bassinet. i wanted a moses basket. i still do. they’re utterly gorgeous and totally up my style alley. the price tag, however, is not. couldn’t justify it.
i also really wanted a dock-a-tot, but the sale of this brand and other baby nests that have been billed as a sleep device/aid/whatever-you-want-to-call-it have been banned in canada because our government doesn’t believe that anything should be placed in the crib with the baby, nor should the baby bedshare. interestingly, the reviews in its country of origin are all pretty stellar, and a lot of mother’s swear by it.
i did some research on how to sew my own but we had so damn much going on i knew there wouldn’t be any time to go that route and i resigned myself to figuring out something else.
until i discovered that well.ca carried a product called snuggle me, one which i had researched in place of the dock-a-tot and had literally added to the shopping cart at least three times before chickening out at the idea of dropping that much on what is essentially a pillow. (i didn’t pull the trigger because this is an american company, so on top a bump in price because of the exchange, we’re also looking at shipping costs, which i pretty much always balk at.)
the snuggle me is labeled as a lounger and is designed to “snuggle” the baby in what resembles a hug from mother. they don’t specify that it is for sleep, but reviews of it have been overwhelmingly positive.
ours was a gift from the company i work for, and i was extremely excited to receive it. first off, it’s a lot heavier than i expected, although i didn’t expect much. i do like how substantial it feels, and it seems quite cozy. it’s quite large, but there’s plenty of space in our king size bed (“king-sized beds save marriages” – my brother). it’s so comfortable, in fact, my cats keep trying to coopt it for themselves. i’m not worried that we will roll over on it, although i sleep with an arm around the top to sort of fend off my SO in case he moves too much. the only struggle is when dylan has her weekly sleepover, that kids arms and legs are everywhere at night.
even though i won’t admit it to my doctor or nurse, i’m reasonably confident in allowing our little man to sleep in this pillow. i did a lot of research on this beforehand, talked to a lot of people. i’m just that much more comfortable when we bedshare, and if we’re going to bedshare, we might as well do it in a way that leaves us feeling secure. dylan slept on my chest and i surrounded myself with pillows. that never felt safe. imho, the snuggle me is a decent workaround, easy to clean, comfortable, and worth every penny for peace of mind.
i can also see this being super beneficial when babe starts to roll all over the place, and he’s already shown an interest. i can sheepishly admit that dylan fell off the bed a handful of times (in my defense, it was a pretty low bed) but the snuggle me will keep him in place if i have to turn my back to change my clothes or even just run to the bathroom.
peace of mind – if anything, parents need more of that!
i’m a firm believer in making decisions that suit their family as opposed to blindly following the rules and “common sense”. i advocate reading up on the guidelines for safe sleep, but also encourage checking out your options. follow snuggle me organic on instagram for inspiration, but visit their website for more detailed information on the product.
-july 2, 2018